Happy New Year, friend! I hope you had a wonderful Christmas.

It’s that time again, a new year, with new ambitions, new projects, and time to review your ongoing plans to pursue your dream. Do you reflect on the past year before making goals for the New Year? Do you review your achievements, and make notes on any incomplete goals?
I do. My time of reflection began in mid-October when I was diagnosed with a critical illness. No worries, it’s not life-threatening, however, the diagnosis was my wake-up call to re-evaluate what is important, and what is not.
At the end of October, my scheduled week of vacation was spent on the sofa instead of enjoying the outdoors and working on projects. Frustrated with my illness, I became depressed.
“You’ve got to let it go and stay positive. I’ve made some pot liquor (turnip soup), your dad’s bringing it to you.”
My mom’s idea of self-care is to sip on nourishing homemade soup of some sort. I didn’t want any soup, I wanted to be outdoors digging in my flower beds, decorating my front porch for fall, and pulling my Christmas decorations from the barn.
“Listen to your doctor; no stress.” My husband held his arm around me as he walked me to the dinner table.
Easier said than done. Telling someone not to worry or stress is like telling a two-year-old they can’t have candy before dinner.
“You have to take care of yourself,” Thomas, my youngest son, crooned. “You’re not getting any younger.”
Duh.
Thomas’s curt reply cut me to the quick. Yes, I’m not getting any younger, none of us are, I didn’t want to hear it. I wanted sympathy and compassion.
Isn’t that how life works sometimes? Harsh life lessons and the truth are often delivered when we want sympathy and a shoulder to cry on.
“You know what you need to do to beat this and to be healthy again. It’s up to you. We will support you; we can’t do it for you.”
That was that. No sympathy, or empathy. It was all up to me and me alone to pull myself out of the gloomy slump.
Taking heed to my family’s concerns, I researched tips on how to remove stress from my life. After several videos on the YouTube channel, I wrote a list of the things that triggered stress in my life during 2023. And guess what? Not one item on my list were things I could control. Not one.
A printed unfinished manuscript beckoned for me to pick it up and go to work where I last stopped. I didn’t have the energy to pick up the manuscript, let alone type on a laptop. I argued with myself. ‘I should have done this, that, and the third.”
All the should’ve, could’ve and would’ve, were not going to change anything. At that moment I knew if I wanted to move forward, I needed to make some major changes in my life. I needed to let go of the past, and devise a plan on how I can accomplish my goals for the upcoming year. I read my Bible, journaled my thoughts, and my disappointments in a notebook.
A bible verse from my reading came to mind:
Romans 12:2 – NIV Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.
Renewing of your mind – could it be as simple as replacing the old way of thinking with a new way? To create a new habit takes two to eight months. That got me to think and ask myself where did I get the idea to believe uncontrollable situations mattered when truly they didn’t? I can’t control the traffic, a flat tire, the weather, the diagnosis of my illness, nor the job cuts taking place at my employer. My pondering went further, over the last ten years. When did I lose sight of what’s important and what my goals are? What contributed to me getting off track? The first step in renewing my mind was to recognize situations I cannot change, and spending time on questions that can’t be answered, I switched gears and focused on getting control of my mindset and making positive habits for the upcoming year.
Allowing myself to focus on the wrong things; uncontrollable situations, such as the uncertainty of my job, harmed myself by stealing my energy and focus away from my writing. Not having control over my thoughts and not focusing on the positive in my life has been a hindrance that robbed me of more than I’ll ever be able to get back.
I was determined to change my viewpoint and to hit the restart button for the new year. What was my restart? I needed to accept that I can’t work a full-time job, come home from work, cook dinner, do laundry, stay up until midnight writing and still be able to wake up in time for work the next day. It was difficult for me to adjust to having limited energy and I must get the proper amount of rest every night.
Turning to a new page in my notebook, I made a list of items that were important to me: my faith, my family, my health, selfcare, following my dream to be an author, and to publish two books in 2024.
Next, I wrote with a different pen in a different color: what’s it going to take for me to stay on course to finish my books and get them ready for an editor? What motivates me to want to write? What keeps me motivated and how will I find the time to write when I have so much to do at home?
On a new page in my notebook I drew a big question mark that filled the page. Going to the gym and walking our pet on long walks around the farm always motivated me to write and most often doing house chores gave me inspiration for scene ideas for my books. I reached for my planner and made a schedule for going to the gym, chores, and free time to work on craft projects. Before I could do those things, I first needed to get my health back in shape.
The next day, after reading my Bible, I made a commitment to stop comparing myself to others.
2 Corinthians 10:12 – NIV We do not dare to classify or compare ourselves with some who commend themselves. When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise.
The Bible verse struck a chord with me. The Bible verse also gave me confirmation I was on the right track, where I needed to be. Many years ago, I attended a literary agent conference in New York City and workshop after workshop, the speakers gave the same advice: find an author you like, follow them, and do what they do if you want to succeed as an author.
Looking back, I was naïve, and ignorant. Wanting to belong and to be accepted in the literary world overshadowed any logical thinking. I was naïve to believe what strangers said to be factual and I was ignorant because the Bible is God’s word, He said it, and I believe God’s word before anyone else.
All the years I’ve read the Bible, until this day, I don’t remember ever reading 2 Corinthians 10:12. I spent the day reading the Bible and reflecting on verses on talents, and our purpose in life God has given each one of us.
Colossians 3:23 – NIV Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters
Through the Bible, I came to understand by comparing myself to others was unrealistic in pursuing my dream to be an author, a setup for failure and self-inflicted discouragement when I did not meet my goals, that sabotaged my motivation to keep writing over the past several years. It’s irrelevant how others are prospering, it has no impact on my accomplishments, nor the number of social media followers someone may have. Researching random topics on ‘Google’, I discovered anyone can buy social media followers. I was stunned as I read one article, detailing how and where to purchase followers for social media. The words of a literary agent came to mind, “follow what other authors are doing if you want to be successful.” I turned to a page in my journal and journaled what was my purpose in having social media and ways it could be used to promote myself as an author and to help motivate others to follow their dreams.
Day four was spent deleting notes from my laptop with previous writing workshops and conferences with all notes referencing to ‘do what the other authors are doing’. How can I be my authentic self if I’m trying to mimic what other authors are doing? I can’t, and I’m satisfied being me.
By day five, I finally gained enough energy to spend some time outdoors on my front porch swing feeling refreshed and renewed of my accomplishments spiritually, mentally, and physically.
By New Year’s Day, I was already putting into practice, if any situation is out of my control, it was of the least importance and not for me to stress over. Instead I go to Jesus in prayer. It was a huge weight lifted off my shoulders when I learned how to let go of the stressful things in my life and focus on the positive. Once I made the decision to re-evaluate my thought process, and to only focus on the positive in my life, even the heaviness of my illness began to lift off my shoulders.
And it’s working. For the first time in a long time, I’m focused on my writing again, I’ve modified my blog name and I have a list of ideas to blog for the upcoming months.

I would love to hear how you prepare for the New Year. Feel free to drop me a line at: rebecca42owens@gmail.com

Until next time, keep reaching for the stars, Dreams do come true.

Rebecca